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Choosing struggles for having fun in life

Choosing struggles for having fun in life

Today I read two different essays, but they happen to be in the same theme. What is fun? How much struggle do you want to take for that fun?

This essay by Mark Manson was excellent. I specifically like this quote:

If I ask you, “What do you want out of life?” and you say something like, “I want to be happy and have a great family and a job I like,” it’s so ubiquitous that it doesn’t even mean anything.

Isn't that very true? Everyone wants to be happy, wealthy, have a great family. But the most critical thing is what are we willing to struggle. More importantly, what pain can we endure for getting that important thing. The author says:

What we get out of life is not determined by the good feelings we desire but by what bad feelings we’re willing and able to sustain to get us to those good feelings.

We all want to have a fantastic body. But if we don't take the pain of eating right or working out, we can never have it. We all want financial independence and enough money in the bank. But if we don't survive the unpredictable and risk-filled roller coaster ride of entrepreneurship, we can never be independent. You get the drift.

The final point Mark Manson makes is: Our struggles determine our successes. Choose your struggles wisely. 

The second article I read is a nice segue into how to endure the struggle. It is written by James Stuber, a fellow student of the Write of Passage. He has written this series of articles as part of the capstone essay project in WoP (I am still due on the capstone front 😞).

Yes, there are things that we have to endure in our life. It may sound boring, and it may not be fun. But how do you tackle it?

There is a better way to motivate ourselves. With the right mindset, with the right framing, we can learn to enjoy the boring fundamentals, and even find them fun.

This is the key. How do you frame things in the right manner and get fun in doing that? An excellent example is from another blogger, Tynan, who enjoys washing the dishes. But look at the way he frames it:

“I could appreciate the warm water on my hands and the shine in the pot when it was clean…it was so enjoyable that I actually found myself looking forward to washing the dishes the next day.”

We all think fun is "fun". Like watching Netflix, eating doughnuts and just bumming around. Sure, it is fun. But not all fun is created equal. Fun can also be categorised as Type 1 and Type 2 fun.

Type 1 fun - It’s effortless, lazy, untarnished by setbacks: Netflix, bumming around, Instagram, others.

Type 2 fun - Suffer now, but fun in retrospect. Running, weightlifting, swimming, writing.

So the critical thing to take away from James' essay is 

  • Type 2 Fun is real and worth looking for

  • With the right mindset and right way of framing our fun, we can make boring fundamentals fun!

The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman

Mindset by Carol Dweck

Mindset by Carol Dweck